Tuesday, July 28, 2009

Fabulous Weekend Part 2, Saturday

Saturday morning, after a somewhat entertaining night trying to get the girls to go to bed early, Tay was picked up early and we started to get ready to go to the beach while we waited for Jenny to come pick up Elizabeth and Allison. Carina and her friend Emily (who was staying the weekend) were super excited about the beach trip of course, and that was before Jenny and her husband decided to meet us down there with the girls.

The weather was absolutely perfect for a day at the beach on Saturday...there was a nice breeze, strong enough to keep us cool but not strong enough to really kick up the waves too badly. The four girls played in the sand and dug up seashells while the adults either a) chilled on the beach or b) waded out into the water. There was no where we had to be, no pressure from work or family or anything, just the beach.

I remember remarking to Erica, "I am so grateful that God put something this beautiful on earth for us." I will never understand how anyone can not believe in God after seeing something so wonderful as the beach.

Amazingly I managed to avoid a sunburn (again!) and we left around 6 to head back to town. My new friend Z invited me out to Cafe Byobla, a mediterranean restaurant on Richmond, to listen to a live Arabic band, watch a belly dancer, and smoke some hookah. The food there was absolutely amazing, too. I mean, we all know how fabulous hummus is, right? Now, imagine hummus with chopped lamb and pine nuts on top. Yumm!

So that was my "mental health" day.

All four of the girls: Elizabeth, Emily, Allison, and Carina (who wouldn't open her eyes)

Erica and Jenny, take 1

Ah, that's more like it

Carina, sittin' pretty

Emily with the boogie board

The girls found little clams, and proceeded to flip out about it. Observe.

Monday, July 27, 2009

Fabulous Weekend part 1, Friday

This past weekend was just magical. That is the only word I can think of to properly describe it. After a couple weeks of stress and roller-coaster ride of emotions I really needed this break and I am so thankful that I got it.

Friday was my friend Erica's daughter Carina's eighth birthday party. To celebrate she invited four of her friends over for a dress-up dance party and the girls had an absolute blast putting on all the dresses that Erica had lying around the house, putting on make-up, and presenting a fashion show for us. They were so creative and came up with the fashion show idea all on their own and even included different categories...formal dresses, casual dresses, and a swimsuit competition.

I have to say that I think Erica, Ashley, and I had just as much fun watching them as they did actually doing it. It was so refreshing to stop worrying about things for a while and just watch the girls play and completely enjoy themselves.

Here are a few of my favorite pictures...

The birthday girl striking a pose

Jennifer's daughter Elizabeth showing off some moves, with Carina and Tay (Ashley's daughter) getting in on the fun

More pictures and parts 2 and 3 of my weekend to come. For now, back to work, before my manager catches me =P

Praying for Baby Stellan

This poor little guy is really doing poorly right now and could use all the prayers he can get. Lord, watch over him.


Thursday, July 16, 2009

My Happy Place

I know I've said it many many times to anyone who cares to listen -- and a few people who don't -- but the beach is my absolute favorite place in the world. I can't even really explain it but no matter what's going on in my life, how bad or down I'm feeling, the beach always gives me a sense of peace.

On Tuesday night I went to dinner with the Weatherford guys: Cris, Ivano, Hector, Tiago, and Marcin. It was kind of a farewell dinner since their training course is wrapping up and they're all about to go back to their respective homes at the end of this week. I think most of them had been drinking for about 4 hours straight by that point which is probably how I managed to get them to agree to pile into the Mazda instead of walking to Hooters.

Yeah, you heard me, all five of them in the Mazda 929. But that's a (hilarious) story I'm going to save for later.

To make a long story short, they invited me out to the beach with them on Wednesday, I called in a few favors to get my shift at work covered, and off I went.

Now, Galveston really isn't the nicest beach, at all. The water is brown, you can't see the bottom, sometimes there are so many jellyfish you're lucky to be able to walk on the sand without stepping on one, but I still love it. I can't even explain it but I just love it. One of the best nights of my life was spent on the beach.

Everything that had gone on over the past week or so was really weighing me down by the time we actually parked at East Beach, and I was close to just wanting to curl up in the back seat of the truck and sleep. I had a breakdown with Erica on the phone that was really kind of embarassing considering I was stuck in the truck with three guys that really don't know me too well, and it was just one of those times where I was just like, "What the hell is the point anymore?"

But the beach...

The moment my feet hit the sand, I was calm. My mind settled, the vice that was gripping my chest loosened, and for the first time in a week and a half I could take a breath. The sun was scorching hot and the sand would singe your feet if you weren't careful, but nothing really bothered me at that point. I could smell and taste the salt on the wind and everything else just faded away.

I still don't know what I'm doing anymore. This past week I've made some mistakes that I wish I could take back but I know I can't; I just know the best I can do is learn from them. I feel adrift, like I've lost my footing on how I'm supposed to deal with things, but I'm trying. I just need to get my head straight and the beach helped a lot in that regard. I'll talk more about that later on...right now I'm still trying to cling to that sense of peacefullness I had on Wednesday before I have to admit I'm back in the real world again.

Saturday, July 11, 2009

A Disclaimer

I probably should've made this post first...hmm, oh well, hindsight is 20/20, as they say. Better late than never, right? Right?!

Anyway, rambling aside, it is my goal to be as honest as possible on this blog, and that being said, I know something I say at some point is bound to rub someone the wrong way. If this is you, I'm sorry. Anyone who knows me knows that I am never intentionally mean or cruel to anyone. Yes, I am a smart-ass, sarcastic as hell, but I never do it with the intention to hurt anyone.

I'm going to be up-front and open on things, including my family, my friends, my ex's, my co-workers, my views on God and politics, the new Angus burgers at McDonald's, everything. I don't mean it to, but considering how everyone has differing views, it's kind of inevitable that someone's going to get offended. Sorry, I'm not doing it on purpose, that's just how I feel.

Most of the people close to me know how I feel about them (or at least they should) so I'm not so worried about that. Even if they don't, they definitely should know that I love each and every one of them more than I can say, and nothing will ever change that.

One last thing for now...I do curse. I'm trying to cut back here but it's going to slip out every now and then. I can't help it; sometimes nothing but an F-bomb will get the point across.

And I think that's it for the disclaimer...I may add more on later if I think it's needed.

Oh, and the new Angus burger at McDonald's? Eh, so-so. The bun is a little more dough-y (is that even a word?) than I like and the meat is so-so. I think I prefer home-made burgers cooked on a grill with good friends and copious amounts of beer (or margaritas!), so sue me.


Friday, July 10, 2009

No More Waiting

When I was about to start this blog -- waiting to start this blog, as it were -- I realized that most of my adult life has been spent waiting on other people. Waiting on my father's work to turn around so I could afford to go back to school. Waiting for my father to get another job so I could start my life. Waiting, waiting, waiting...

I am done with waiting. I've had friends try and try repeatedly to drill it into my head that I have no obligations to put my life on hold indefinitely to take care of my family. It wasn't until recently, though, that I could see a way around it. I was always conflicted, wanting to start my life and at the same time unable to imagine simply abandoning the responsibilities I have taken on.

And then I thought...why can't I have both?

Recent events, while immensely painful, have also opened doors in my life. I've thought about it, cried about it, and prayed about it, and I decided I'm going to do it. I'm going to move on, finally, from everything. I'm going to buy a car of my own, go back to school, and try to pick up the pieces to my broken heart along the way. I'm going to support my family but live my own life, too.

So that's the general idea here. I have no idea if I'm going to be able to do it, but luckily I have some amazing people in my life that I know will provide the support -- or the swift kick in the bum -- that I need to find my way.

To find Sarah...